Being an unpaid carer for a family member or friend with a disability or long-term illness can come with hidden challenges that often aren’t talked about.
One of the most difficult and often overlooked realities is the potential for abuse, which can affect both the person being cared for and the person providing care. If you’re an unpaid carer, you may face
physical, emotional, financial or sexual abuse from the very person you are trying to support.
Similarly, if you are unwell or living with a disability, the person who is caring for you could be the one abusing you. Abuse can involve a range of controlling and harmful behaviours, these may include:
- Coercive control
- Psychological and emotional abuse
- Physical or sexual abuse
- Financial or economic abuse
- Harassment and stalking
- Online or digital abuse
Certain risk factors can make individuals more vulnerable to domestic and sexual abuse. Those with disabilities, poor mental health, or dementia are often at heightened risk due to their increased reliance on others for support. Social isolation can add to this, leaving people without a network of support or someone to turn to for help.
Additionally, when someone is dependent on others for care, it can create a power imbalance, making it even harder to escape situations of abuse. As an unpaid carer, you may be vulnerable to abuse. You may often be isolated, behind closed doors with the person you care for. You may find that their personality or behaviour has changed and now you find yourself fearful of their words or actions. No one should have to stay in an abusive situation.
If you or someone else you know is in immediate danger, call 999. If calling from a mobile and it’s not safe to speak, press 55 and you will be connected to the police. You can also speak to us here at
Caring Together Charity. Call our non-emergency Advice Line on 01480 499090.
For further local support, the below organisations may be relevant to your situation.
Local support
- DASS (Domestic Abuse Support Service) for Cambridgeshire and Peterborough residents freephone – call 0300 373 1073
- Norfolk County Council Domestic Abuse Support
- Cambridge Women’s Aid – To access safe refuge accommodation call 01223 460947
- Peterborough Women’s Aid
- Refuge
- Cambridge and Peterborough Rape Crisis Partnership
- The Elms Sexual Assault Referral Centre or call 0800 193 5434
- Mankind (for men) or call 0808 800 1170
- Cambridge Rape Crisis Centre – call 01223 313 551
- The Dhalia Project supporting south Asian victims of Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) – call 01733 894964
